Letter

Dear You Know Who You Are,
I’ve had about enough. You think that whatever you are going through is so much more than the rest of us. Well here’s a news flash: you are a selfish bastard who can’t appreciate the sacrifices his loved ones are making for him.
I’m not saying my life is more difficult than yours, far from it! I know I have it easier and better in many respects- I was blessed with brains, for one. You are a complete and total idiot, though, for screwing yourself over repeatedly and fooling yourself into believing that you like it.
I wonder now, if I still love you. I know I’m supposed to, but its not like you are worthy. Its not like you reciprocate. Every time I try to get in touch with you, you aren’t there. Every time I do talk to you, it’s about something superficial and trivial. Why are you so afraid to let me in? I’ve never given you a reason to distrust me or to think that I’ve abused your trust. Do you not have faith in my judgment or reasoning any more?
I thought you’d learn something after the last big thing that happened to you. Apparently, you didn’t. You are still the same idiot who won’t confront his issues. How can they overwhelm you? You are such a big man, aren’t you? And yet you haven’t yet reached the lonely conclusion that I am slowly and painfully arriving at: you don’t need any one to validate you, except yourself.
Thanks to you, I can’t do many things I would love to try. As one of the older ones, I have to set you an example. Insane expectations!
I don’t know if you will ever read this. I don’t know if I will ever be able to sit you down and talk to you about it. You know what you are doing with your life; you are an informed person. I just really needed to get this off my chest.
I like someone. Did you know that? Would you have cared even if I had told you? I go through the same rubbish you do. I handle it differently, not necessarily better. But that doesn’t matter, does it? To you I am just who you think I am and you don’t really want to get to know who I think I am.
I’ve tried and tried and I can’t try anymore. I’m giving up on you. Don’t think you’ll notice, but I guess I should give you fair warning. I don’t think you deserve any more sympathy or understanding or loyalty. The tap’s run dry.
So long. We can go our separate ways. And for some strange reason, I will always love you.
Me.